Relationship with Self and Others

Who I am explore the uniqueness and meaning of experiences in being a woman explore the Self we express to the world and the Self we may (or dare) express to our self explore the relationship we as women have with our body/our sexuality The various relationships with Self and Others Exploring relationships with self mirroring relationship with others? Every relationship tells something about who we are Revising relationships & Exploring different possibilities for who we are and/or who we may be Styles of Relating Reflect on own style/s of relating What benefits might there be What pitfalls might there be How does it feel physically? How does it feel emotionally? What are some family, cultural social beliefs and messages about how to be in relationships? Blocks that can potentially get in the way of preferred relationships with Self and Others Examples: Perfectionism Anger Self Esteem Shame Other? If you wish to know more, please contact Angela Ranallo...

Relationship with Self and Others by Angela Ranallo

Recovering from Trauma and Abuse

Experiences of abuse and violence have the potential of creating doubts and disqualify a person's own beliefs about who s/he is as a person and of their capabilities. It increases guilt, shame and sense of worthlessness. It creates vulnerability for people to more easily get recruited into negative stories about their identity. Trauma affects the capacity to recall and integrate the fullness of experiences encompassing sensations, images, behaviour, emotions and meaning making. It can bring about a disconnection between different aspects of self. Although some trauma memories may not be remembered, they may be sensed or felt in the body as sensations, as somatic pain; as skin rashes/eczema or affect body co-ordination; hypersensitivity to sensory stimuli such visual, auditory, smell, taste. When trauma memories get triggered there is the potential of the trauma getting replayed in 'the -here-and now' in people's lives bringing about a fragmentation of self at that point. Trauma...

Potential Effects of Experience of Abuse

The visual diagram below shows examples of the areas of living potentially affected by experiences of abuse. Diagram - 2 EXPLORATION OF SEXUALITY & SELF IDENTITY IN THE CONTEXT OF SEXUAL ABUSE Adapted by Angela Ranallo 2005 from Allan Jenkins and Johnella Bird Experiences of abuse and violence have the potential of creating doubts and disqualify a person's own beliefs about who s/he is as a person and of their capabilities. It increases guilt, shame and sense of worthlessness. It creates vulnerability for people to more easily get recruited into negative stories about their identity. If you wish to have more information please make contact...

Parental Influence and Effects on Children

It is my professional opinion that children's views in general are influenced to a lesser or greater degree, by significant people and situations in their lives. Parental influence on children and young people's views and beliefs is inevitable. Parental influence is transferred to children through comments, conversations, actions and the relationship the parents have with each other. It becomes much more important for children of separated parents to become attuned to cues from their parents of what is acceptable, as children want to please parents. In situations where there may be conflict and antagonism in the separated parental relationship, the children try even harder toward learning ways of pleasing parent/s in the hope of maintaining parental peace. Many times, the pleasing of parent/s could come at a cost to the children's emotional, physical and social wellbeing. The result is children experiencing high levels of stress. Living in alternate households, in their daily interactions children would...

Muscle Relaxation for Children

Adapted by Angela Ranallo from Dr J Irvine "who'd be a parent?" Hands and arms: get them to pretend to be squeezing an orange. When it's all squeezed out they let it drop and let their muscles relax. Arms and shoulders: get them to pretend they are a cuddly cat that's stretching, raising their arms high over their head, back to their side, out in front, up to the ceiling, and finally dropping down by their side. Shoulders: let them pretend they are a turtle sensing danger, pulling their head in tight into their shoulders, right up to their ears if they can. When the danger passes they relax and come back out into the warm sunshine. Jaw: let them pretend they have a hard caramel in their mouth. They bite down on it hard and then let their jaw relax. Repeat. Face and nose: let them pretend an annoying fly lands on their nose...

Memories held in the body

THE BODY - Memories are held in the body (Richard Rose Life story Therapy with Traumatised Children) Triggers, often non verbal may cause physical reactions which is automatic and not associated with cognitive story-telling. Van der Kolk (1992) argues that trauma therapy has to involve the individual working with their 'body states', assisting a person's ability to regain calm. Levine (1997) argues that trauma is a biological response to a perceived and/or actual threat where the body is unable to discharge the experience physically and therefore the experience is locked within the body Kardiner and Spiegel 1947 'memory boxes' (often referred to as procedural memory) is held within the body. When children/adults are traumatised by the experience, whether as a direct or indirect experience, they store the memory, the reactions, the thoughts and the feelings. In effect the body as well the brain, become a storage facility of memory = 'a person-sized memory box' The body...

Foster Placement Transition

Developmental implications "Children who have experienced abuse or neglect have a heightened need for permanency, security, and emotional constancy and are, therefore, at great risk because of the inconsistencies in their lives and the foster care system" "Multiple moves while in foster care...

How to write and engage in Parallel Healing Stories

Parallel story telling/writing - have themes resonating with children's own life/situation. Through the process of the creative story-telling, there are pauses and reflections about the similarities to children's own life. This process enables children to give voice to his/her emotional vulnerability. This has the potential to be a healing process This process engages children's imagination and creativity as a resource for emotional and reflective expression, moving between the landscape of fantasy, landscape of reflection and landscape of reality. If you wish to know more about how to write and use Parallel Stories, please make contact with Angela Ranallo....

Children relationship with separated parents

The parents usually indicate that they want the children to have a good relationship with the other parent. To achieve this, it would be helpful for the children to be encouraged by each parent to minimise any interest and involvement in the details of parental conflict and to focus on enjoying the time they have with the parent they are with at the time. In many ways it is easy for children to align themselves with one parent because this reduces their confusion. Ultimately it is better if they are assisted to focus on the fact that each parent loves them. It would also be helpful if each parent is able to clearly give the children permission to enjoy a relationship with the other parent so that they do not feel disloyal to one or the other. In situations where there is ongoing conflict and antagonism in the separated parental relationship what has the potential...